Happy Tuesday! Today, I’m diving down to explore the first rule in the 7 Rules of Life, which I mentioned in last week’s post.
Rule #1: Make peace with your past so it does not affect the present.
When I first read it, I thought, “Okay, got it…next?”
But I stopped and remembered my new plan for this year: Pause and make sure you’re really ready to move on. So, my meditation for that day focused on each part of this deceptively straightforward statement.
Make...meaning to do something. It may or may not be something that I actually want to do, like unloading the dishwasher.
…peace…Merriam-Webster defines it as 1. A state of tranquility or quiet; 2. Freedom from disquieting or oppressive thoughts or emotions; 3. Harmony in personal relations.
…with your past…Now we’re getting personal. My past – things that I specifically experienced and my reaction to or memory of an event.
…so it does not affect…Fairly straightforward. Affect: meaning to produce an effect upon someone or something.
…the present…meaning right now—today.
As I sit here thinking about this Rule, I realize how true it is. I’m noticing more and more wrinkles on my face, and in a flash, I’m taken back in time.
Flash to the Past
As a teen, I had really bad acne and was deeply embarrassed about it. Being a teenager is tough enough without having large red bumps covering your face. The cruel nicknames and comments from my classmates just intensified my humiliation. I accepted their words as an accurate reflection of me as a person.
Into my 20s, scrubs and medication helped reduce the breakouts, but the self-consciousness seemed to be part of my DNA. Makeup hid the residual scars from the outside world. But in my mind, I still heard echoing taunts.
Eventually, a dermatologist sold me on an expensive chemical peel procedure, which left me with large patches of red burned skin that no makeup would cover.
“Oh my God, what happened?!” people commented commonly.
“It was an accident,” I learned was the best response.
I cried and punched pillows because nothing I did seemed to help. In time, I learned to look below my skin to see the real me.
I’m a kind person and one who understands the concept of not judging a book by its cover.
Flash to Today
I’m happy to report my burned skin from years ago completely healed, but it’s not perfect. For me, Rule #1 means learning lessons, letting go of the pain, and living with wisdom. Now, when I look in the mirror at the rapidly increasing wrinkles on my face, I’m at peace, realizing they’re not that important.
I don’t need, nor want, injections or lasers to smooth my skin; my life is full of the things that really matter. This perspective, which is strengthened by hypnosis, helps me maintain healthy self-acceptance, imperfections and all.
What about you? Is there anything that has been following you for a while that you need to make peace with?
If you’d like to share your thoughts or stories, please comment below.
Cheers,
Marilyn
